Are you viewing porn 'too much'?
This article is rated 18 I (for those whom are 18 years of age and inquisitive only)
"Those people spending large amounts of time accessing porn are not having more fun," said Dr Heather Wood.
"They are more worried about themselves, more worried about what they are looking at, and report more relationship problems."
Four per cent of men aged 18-24 (in the UK) said they used adult sites for more than 10 hours a week, a level which doctors describe as "problematic and potentially compulsive". bbc
There are quite a few ways of looking at it.
You could say that those who don’t look at porn sites enough, and, um, pleasure themselves whilst doing so, are more prone to premature ejaculation, not being able to ‘do it’ for long enough, and don’t have much of an imagination whilst doing it.
You could also say that those who spend too much time doing such things won’t have much of a personality other than one which might aptly present him as nothing more than a ‘dickhead’ - one who only really thinks, has expressions, or get excited about a conversation, when it has to do with women.
But what is ‘too much time’? That has to be defined first. All those academics who view spending more than 10 hours a week at masturbation or viewing porn sites are also probably those who think that ‘doing it’ (excluding foreplay) for more than an hour is ‘too much time’ as well.
But the point is that ‘too much time’ can only be defined by its ratio to one’s free time, and the amount of time spent doing other developmental things, i.e. pastimes that develop other aspects of one’s persona, like, say, photography (not nude models or your nude self alright), reading (non-pornographic stuff that is), learning a new skill (not in reference to sex toys idiot), reflecting (not on your last tryst dickhead), amongst others.
i like to complement my XXX with YYY. That is, asking ‘Y’(why) about tons of other stuff from technology, to the arts, to politics, history, etc, etc. Not only does that breed lots of perspectives in oneself, which can also spice things up in bed, but it serves as a buffer against the otherwise ill-effects of what will hence be too much XXX.
In recent years, i’ve been inclined to think that the ‘sins’ we engage in is sinful not because it is sinful in itself, but because we might get fixated and not spend as much time on other aspects of our thus, yet-to-be-explored persona. Like, for instance, i’ve always thought that the Chinese spend ‘too much time’ eating and travelling from place to place looking for food than having sex - and the bland quality of their food, and the intellectually/creatively dullness of the programmes they watch whilst eating doesn’t help in spicing things up personality-wise either. And as for the Indians I’ve known, the inverse is true. Not good either way unless more time is spent in the aesthetic and intellectual department than either eating or sex.
That is how I would determine if ‘too much time’ is spent ‘eating’ or ‘f......’.
The ‘sin’ lies in our not spending more time in other, as said, developmental ventures. These ‘developmental ventures’ cannot include work, as work monopolises your senses and schedules when you are supposed to show interest, initiative and imagination. Hence, work narrows your ability to exhibit these most human of traits in other arenas. So, if one was to only ‘work’ and then engage in sex or even a conversation, it can become a self-centred venture and relationships will not be psychologically fulfilling either - because enough interest, initiative and imagination has to be invested in non-work pastimes for these 3 I’s to be freed to be curious and empathetic for fruitful use in any relationship or arena. (Oh, by the way, computer games do not qualify even if it is a non-work venture as it is based on reflex, you are not creatively working on it as you might with, say, a saxophone, and it is mainly competitive with the user seeking immediate gratification. That just increases self-absorption.)
A lot of vices are fine with moderation, so long as ‘moderation’ is defined by such activities being moderated by more activities in the intellectual and aesthetic arenas. If you do that, you might even find that the latter will feedback positively on the sinful turning it into a virtue.
Sexual activities, like eating hot curries, fuels what I would term, ‘primitive vibrancy’. It makes you feel alive and invigorated - if the food is spicy enough, or the ‘activity’ is long enough. It is fuel that you can use in other arenas. But when this fuel is not recognised as beneficial for spurring you in other arenas, and one does not practice using this vibrancy in other arenas, than one drowns in it and becomes a lesser person, whilst making everything s/he does less as well. In that sense, working too much means not having sex enough, not developing your other aspects enough, etc, etc.
These factors have to be taken into account when considering if one is spending ‘too much time’ on masturbation, sex, or porn sites. If not, ‘too much time’ will just began to be defined by social norms which, in some cases, might mean, ‘if you spend more time f*c&i%g than eating, that’s perverted/too much time/weird/etc’. So are you spending too much time engaged in the 3 X’s (masturbation, sex, porn)? Look at the ratio between your time spent on developmental stuff and the 3 X’s, and you’ll have your answer. A lot of vices are fine with moderation, so long as ‘moderation’ is defined by such activities being moderated by more activities in the intellectual and aesthetic arenas. If you do that, you might even find that the latter will feedback positively on the sinful turning it into a virtue.
When people start asking each other, ‘when was the last time you read a good book’, and expressing as much or more shock at finding out that it had been 3 months, as they do when they find out that you hadn’t had sex for the past month, than we can be sure that society is on the right track.
For myself, i like to complement my XXX with YYY. That is, asking ‘Y’(why) about tons of other stuff from technology, to the arts, to politics, history, etc, etc. Not only does that breed lots of perspectives in oneself, which can also spice things up in bed, but it serves as a buffer against the otherwise ill-effects of what will hence be too much XXX.
When people start asking each other, ‘when was the last time you read a good book’, and expressing as much or more shock at finding out that it had been 3 months, as they do when they find out that you hadn’t had sex for the past month, than we can be sure that society is on the right track.
ed
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